DEAR GOD...

I won't believe in heaven and hell. No saints, no sinners, no devil as well. No pearly gates, no thorny crown. You're always letting us humans down. The wars you bring, the babes you drown. Those lost at sea and never found, and it's the same the whole world 'round. The hurt I see helps to compound that Father, Son and Holy Ghost is just somebody's unholy hoax, And if you're up there you'd perceive that my heart's here upon my sleeve. If there's one thing I don't believe in

It's you....

~ XTC

I've always liked and related to this song. There is one thing about my atheism that I find interesting and a little weird, I love churches. I love highly ornate catholic churches and I love the austere protestant churches. I love store-front iglesias de dios and synagogues. They are all so different and interesting. I suppose it comes from my art history background and being immersed in the symbolism of all that art. The mind reels at all the time and energy and money that went into creating those interiors, the statuary, the sculpted altars, the stained glass, and that's just the inside!

My father's family is catholic, my father was an altar boy almost until the day he married my mother. Needless to say, we were raised catholic. Our church was in Manomet, St Bonaventure's. It was a boring church, none of the archaic or gothic about it. Well except for the priest, Father Higgins. But that's a story for another day. Sometimes my dad would mix it up and take us to St Peter's, the church he grew up in, or to St Mary's out in North Plymouth. I remember those churches being dark and very mysterious.

St Peter's has those magnificent columns and vaulted ceilings while St Mary's was all dark wood inside with a very large (and somewhat creepy) crucifix hanging over the altar. To the right of the altar was a votive offering consisting of red and blue glasses holding candles. You could put an offering in the box and light one for somebody who had died or was sick or just needed a little something extra. And the plaster wall behind these votives was black with the soot from so many years of being lit, over and over again. I loved going to St Mary's, it had an old-world charm about it because the parish was primarily Portuguese and Italian immigrants who worked for the Plymouth Cordage Company.

Alas, times, and the churches with them, have changed. Both St Peter's and St Mary's have become more user-friendly. They have renovated their interiors to be more welcoming and less oppressive. Gone are the dark woods and soot covered walls, and in my opinion, a lot of the mystery.

I started this post to introduce some pictures I took of a greek orthodox church down in Hyannis in July. They have an annual festival and I was excited to be able to see the inside of the church and all the artwork therein. One of the prettiest I've ever seen.

MEMOIRS

I've been taking a memoirs writing workshop with my mom for the last few months. She is a prolific poem writer and wants to get them organized in a coherent manner to make a book for all us kids. I'm her typist, but thought taking it with her would help with my blog writing.

The last assignment was to write about somebody who has made a difference in our lives. I don't even know where to begin with that. I've met a lot of people in my life and most of them have been influential in one way or another. I guess we're supposed to pick the person who has had the greatest impact on us, but there are so many people from whom to choose! Needless to say, I have not even started this assignment, I might never.

I feel that everyone I come into contact with makes some difference in my life, good or not so good. And the not so good probably have some positive affect, even if I'm not immediately, or ever, aware of it. I am one of those people who thinks that everything happens for a reason, so that jerk who cut me off in traffic this morning could have saved my life, but I'll never know! There have been a lot of people I have never met and never will who have impacted my life.

Animals too have had a huge impact on my life. I love my cats like they are my children and I still miss the kitties that have gone on to the giant catnip field in the sky, Windy, Max, Miles, Alec, Winston, all my precious babies. Fish in an aquarium, stray birds and mice I've tried to save, they've all left an imprint, taught me something about myself and the world in which I live. There was one sheep in particular that changed my life forever.

I think maybe that sheep was the most influential, really. She was at the Topsfield Fair being shown in the 4H sheep tent. I squatted down to see her at eye level and pet her. She nuzzled my face and that was it. I decided right then and there that I would stop eating meat.

I had been reading a lot about vegetarianism and the impact livestock farming is having on our planet but hadn't made the final commitment to giving up meat. I had stopped eating meat the previous spring but when I smelled the first cookout of the summer, it was all over. In November of 1988 I stopped eating meat. In December of 1988 I stopped wearing leather and using products that contained animal-derived ingredients. In October of 2009, I finally gave up dairy, eggs and honey. I feel lighter, healthier and happier, knowing that I'm not harming other animals and I'm taking better care of myself.

Becoming vegan is probably the single most important thing I've ever done.

ALMOST WINTER

I went up to the cottage with my mother on Friday. It was very cold and very windy. This is not the time of year we spend much time up there and so I'm always surprised by how barren and gray everything is. We can't see the water from this vantage point in the summer.

I hope the cottage is hibernating and not missing all the people and activity.

After all the rain that Plymouth has had recently, the beach is half gone! It should be back by the time we want to swim.

Water all the way up to the fire pit!

The kayaks all nestled in for their long winter nap.

I am really looking forward to the spring when the green will be back and the promise of summer will be in the air!

THE RESPONSE

from the organizing committee of the Plymouth Thanksgiving Parade to my letter of complaint.
Hi Penny,
Thank you for giving us this important feedback about the parade. We have worked diligently since we took over the management of the America's Hometown Thanksgiving Celebration to best represent Plymouth's heritage. We pride ourselves on bringing to the community something to be proud to be a part of. The balloon piece of the parade something that one of our sponsors managed independently. It is our understanding that the balloon company delivered the Native American balloon in error and was actually
supposed to deliver a balloon depicting a turkey and a chef. We recognize that everything that comes through the parade is a reflection of our organization and your email is a reminder to us to be constantly diligent. If you would like to further discuss this or have additional feedback that you think would be useful for us to preserve our heritage, please do not hesitate to call me directly. Again, I thank you for bringing your concerns to our attention. Feedback such as yours is vital to the growth of our organization.

Sincerely,
Olly Demacedo
America's Hometown Thanksgiving Celebration
617-759-3139

GOOD KNEES GONE BAD

When I was 11, I was diagnosed with Osgood Schlatter Disease and I was excused from gym class for all of sixth grade. Since then my knees have been a little sketchy. Most of the time they're cool, but every once in awhile, for no apparent reason, they just "go out".

As you know, I've been working out at the Y for a month and I'm loving it. Well, about a week ago my knees started to bother me, the left one especially. One night last week it got so bad I was lying on my bed crying in pain and frustration. I was so worried that, after the progress I've made, I'd have to give up the aerobic workout I have come to LOVE.

I went to my doctor and had some x-rays and found that I have mild arthritis in the left knee and moderate arthritis in the right. I am not surprised by this, it runs in my family. My grandmother was all but crippled by it and my dad had knee replacement surgery a year ago because of it.

For me it's a bit of a catch-22. I have been overweight all my life, which exacerbates the arthritis and when I'm finally doing something about it and actually losing weight, the knees are bad enough that changes must be made to the workout. No more elliptical for me. I have begun to swim.

The Y has a 75 foot long pool with lap lanes available every day, all day. I went for the first time on Thursday thinking it wouldn't be as good and it kicked my ass! I did 5 laps of the crawl and it made me dizzy.

My armpits are sore.

I can't wait to go again tomorrow!

BEYOND THE PALE

I have already written a letter of complaint to the
Plymouth Thanksgiving Parade organizing committee.
I cannot believe that they would allow such a balloon
to be displayed in the parade. I was horrified when I saw
this picture. If you find this offensive, please write
to the committee's Executive Director, Olly de Macedo,
at floats@usathanksgiving.com.

SCUSSET AT SUNSET

We went for a late afternoon motorcycle ride today

down to Scusset Beach. I love going to the beach,

no matter the season, but I especially love it in the

cold weather. It's so calm and serene and beautiful.

A LITTLE SUNSHINE ON A RAINY DAY

Monday was a gloriously beautiful day. I went for a walk out to Duxbury beach with camera in hand and here are a few of the images I captured.

Milkweed pods have let their seeds fly.

The bridge seems like it goes on forever.

Gulls are beautiful against the blue sky.

The water is mirroring the color of the sky.

Bittersweet at the entrance to the bridge. I think I understand now why it's called bittersweet.

Japanese maples and silver dollar plants at my sister's house.

Today I had my first workout at the Taunton YMCA. It has been 16 years since I belonged to a gym. YIKES!! I have been walking and cycling on and off for those 16 years, but it's not the same as belonging to a gym. I was able to use the elliptical machine for a total of 15 minutes. I burned 190 calories and got my heart rate up to 140. I've got a long way to go.

Last Friday, November 6th was my 48th birthday and I made a birthday resolution. I resolve to change my eating and exercise habits to be as healthy as I can be. I have also challenged myself to lose 100 pounds and stop taking blood pressure medications by my 50th birthday. I have quit drinking coffee and soda. I've been vegetarian for 21 years, so now I'm vegan, having cut out dairy and eggs. I have cut way back on drinking. I have begun to eat whole foods, cutting out as much processed food as possible.

Part of my decision was the health problems I already have, hypertension, 3/4" height loss, recurring foot injuries due to being overweight. The other things that have influenced my decision are two books, Skinny Bitch by Rory Freedman and Kim Barnouin and The China Study by T. Colin Campbell and Thomas M. Campbell II. Real eye-openers, I highly recommend them.

There was a time when I wanted to live to be 120 years old. I don't so much care about quantity as much as quality now. If I'm to live a long life, it has to be a healthy one. So, here I go.

Join me, won't you?

U2

Amy, Pete, Ian and I went to see U2 at Gillette Stadium on Monday night. I haven't seen U2 since the late 80s and boy, have their shows changed! Of course, I know, it goes without saying. They can fill a stadium of that size and they can afford to have a crazy expensive stage set-up. Their performance, however, is still as great as ever. I'm not the world's biggest U2 fan, but I'll see them live anytime somebody wants to spring for the tickets!

Attending this concert came out of Ian going to see a U2 3-D at the IMAX theater of The New England Aquarium with Amy, Jeff and Lauren. After the movie Ian said to Amy "Now I have to see them live." To which Amy replied "Next time they come, I'll get tickets!" And get tickets she did! She even joined the U2 website so that she could take advantage of presale purchasing. She bought the tickets about 4 or 5 months ago and it was a topic of conversation all summer.

The big night finally arrived and we headed out to Foxboro. The campus of Gillette is HUGE! They have the whole Patriot Place thing going on as well as ample parking. The parking, however, is not free! You must pay $40. to park, which might not have been so bad had we been able to exit the lot after the show in a timely fashion. But no, TWO HOURS just to get out onto route 1. This was one of only two complaints I had with the evening.

Once we got in and found our seats, this is what we were looking at. It's a space ship that took on a life of its own once the show started.

A closer view so you can see just how big the thing was. YIKES! There are a couple of bridges from the main stage out to the ring that moved all the way around.

Ian and I.

Amy and Pete very excited for the show to start.

Bono up on the expandable screen, 360 degrees of it. That thing was crazy! It hung down from the underside of the spaceship and could be stretched down to the floor!

http://www.youtube.com/user/pennycariolo#play/all/uploads-all/0/spcMKPZZvJw

This link takes you to a video of the song With or Without You. I didn't get the whole song because of my second complaint of the night. This was the second to last song of the evening, they were about 2/3 through it and some venue staff guy comes up behind me, taps me on the shoulder and tells me if I don't "turn it off and put it away", he'll confiscate my camera. There were at least four other people right in front of me doing the exact same thing, but because I was at the top of the row, I get the shit. If you watch the whole video, you can hear him saying it at the very end.

All in all, I'd have to say it was a GREAT show and I'm so glad we went.

Thanks Amy and Pete!!!

NO, WALTER, YOU'RE NOT WRONG, YOU'RE JUST............

Saturday night was the first of two nights of LEBOWSKIFEST at the House of Blues. Dan, Bridget, Ian, my friend Jon, and I went to the movie portion, Sunday night is the bowling/costume competition portion. There were a few people dressed up in costume but the majority of people were wearing t-shirts with images/lines from the movie on them. I made t-shirts for us to wear, a picture of Lenin saying "I am the walrus". If you haven't seen the movie yet, please rent it, it's hilarious.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_WZOQJTMHVI

Before the movie started, there was an opening band, The Black Diamond Heavies. I did record a song and tried to upload it but Blogger was not cooperating. Click on the link to see it on youtube.

Here's a review I lifted from their MySpace:

"the Heavies like to keep things as raw and ground-up as dirt - drums with a trashcan rattle that sound huge and far away (like they were recorded in a wide-open space down the street) and overdriven Fender Rhodes. That's all there is to it, but then again, there's so much more." --Phoenix New Times

After the movie ended, I bought their cd, EVERY DAMN TIME. Check them out!

They guys who started Lebowskifest get dressed up as bowling pins and do the intros, they also have a guy dressed as the Dude who travels with them. Not a great picture, but you get the idea.

It was a little bit like seeing the Rocky Horror Picture Show with people yelling lines along with the movie. And, of course, they were piping the sound through the club sound system which was kick-ass! The White Russians were flowing and a good time was had by all.

Next year we're going to the bowling portion, Jon and I are already in costume discussions, can't wait!

CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW?

Got a new phone last week. It isn't red, we couldn't find it in red, but still a great phone. I haven't even played with everything it can do, but it's loaded with music for my walks and the sound quality is fantastic! I have a set of earbuds made by iLUV and they're the best I've ever had!

The only problem so far is that I have some homemade ringtones on my old phone that I want to transfer and I was having difficulty doing that. I have since found that the files are Mpegs that need to be converted to QCP files, so I'm going to download a converter and see if that works. If not, I'm stuck with the kooky ringtones on the phone. It won't be horrible, but the tones on the old phone were made by Ian, especially for me. I miss them.

WALK 'N ROLL

In the morning, after dropping Ian at the train, I go for a "power" walk. Swinging arms, handweights, headphones, the whole nine yards. For the longest time I listened to disco because back in the day of aerobics classes that's what we worked out to. Recently though, I've needed something more motivational. After seeing Motley Crue last month, I decided that Metal would do the job.



I have downloaded into my mp3 player Motley Crue, AC/DC, Aerosmith, Alice Cooper, Cheap Trick, Deep Purple and Motorhead, so far, and those 70 songs took about 4 hours. I still have many, many more songs to go through in our iTunes library. The reason it takes so long to load them in is that I have to listen to each one to see if it has the proper speed to keep me going fast enough.

When I hear the opening guitar on It's a Long Way to the Top or the riff at the beginning of Dr. Feelgood, I can feel the endorphins kick in and it makes me walk harder! It takes all I have to keep from headbanging while I'm walking down the street.

STUDIO ENVY

This is a picture of my friend Kendra in her studio, which is in her house!

I have SERIOUS studio envy. I would LOVE to have a room of my own. It would have a dedicated cutting table, a sewing table, shelves for my fabric/notions stash, a place to keep all my yarn, my loom, the spinning wheel, and my dyepots! Ideally, it would be ground-level with a slider out to a concrete slab so that I could do my dyeing right outside and not have to worry about being messy. It would have a big utility sink and a washing machine. Outside, right next to the concrete slab, there would also be a nice clothesline to hang all my dyed projects on for natural drying. Everything would smell so good! AND it would be big enough so that my fiber friends could come and play with me!!!

A girl can dream...

DAD

Saturday was my Dad's birthday, he would have been 68.


On Sunday morning, the nine of us went to the John Carver Inn, affectionately known in our family as "the hotel", for breakfast and to get ready to scatter Dad's ashes.


After breakfast we headed up to Lout Pond on Billington Street, that's where my Dad did a lot of his growing up. My Mom read a poem she'd written and we each scattered a scoopful of ashes.

Then we headed up to our summer cottage at Long Pond. We got out all the kayaks and the canoe. Mom did more readings and then the "Clough-tilla" (thanks Chris!) went out to the middle of the pond and set him free. We stayed out there for awhile, reminiscing and singing a silly song that Dad used to sing while shaving. When we got back to the beach, we hugged, swam, ate lunch and had hot fudge sundaes in Dad's honor. It was a perfect day and he would have enjoyed it so much.


We all miss you and love you so much Dad.

OUR LITTLE PARADISE

Pollywog College. That's the name of the summer cottage that my mom and uncle own. It was named Pollywog Cottage, but my aunt called it college as a little girl and the name stuck. My grandfather bought it when my mother was a little girl and there hasn't been a summer in my life that I haven't been up there. It's on Long Pond in Plymouth and is heaven on earth.

The deck, on the front, overlooks the pond, but there is enough shrubby stuff in front of it to keep it private.

The beach from the end of the dock. From year to year we don't know how much beach we'll have. The winter snow can sometimes take it all away. There have been summers where we've had to put the dock up right at the end of the stairs down from the cottage.

We're on a cove, protected, but we still get to see some very cool action in the sky and the sun sets directly across from our beach. Nothing like sitting on the beach with a cold drink, watching the sun go down.

The flag on the screen is covering a hole to keep the mosquitoes out.

The oar is from a row boat that is long gone, but was really cool. It was big and felt like the shallop at the Mayflower.

Irises all over the place, beautiful when they're all open.

I consider myself to be incredibly fortunate to have had this place in my life and to be able to share it with so many friends.

HAPPY 68th BIRTHDAY MAMA!

WE GONNA ROCK DOWN TO ATLANTIC AVENUE

My mother and I drove down to the cape on Saturday to see my brother and his band play at the Barnstable Fair. His band is called The Atlantic Ave Band and they do a mix of covers. Neither one of us had seen them play, so we were psyched to be going.

My sentiments exactly! And it has nothing to do with being married to a bass player.

The guitar line-up. With this many six-strings, you get a nice full sound and the bassist was giving good bottom!

The audience with Mom singing along to "It's Five O'clock Somewhere". She's a big Alan Jackson fan and digs the Jimmy Buffett a little too.

My bro, winking for the camera, and the ever popular Vinny Conga on, well, the congas!

This little guy was dancing for the whole, 1 1/2 hour set. CUTEST!

Vinny, workin' it!

The bassist, groovin' through the whole set.

"She said don't hand me no lines and keep your hands to yourself"